WISHFUL THINKING or REAL LIFE PARENTING?

Saturday I drove to Salem Oregon to watch our two high school kids compete in their cross country races held at Bush Pasture Park. I had the option of taking our 4-year-old son Augustin or having him tag along with my husband Chris, who was doing the soccer thing with our 9-year-old twins. Divide and conquer as they say.
Chris said, “Leave Augustin with me. Make your time less stressful.”
But I love having my kids with me, especially if they are well behaved!
Before I left, I looked up Bush Park online it showed this really nice play structure and I thought, oh, I really want to take Augustin to show him this park -- and yet, another “reality” voice inside me said – “You know how impatient Augustin can become in situations where he has to wait and you are going to Salem to watch cross country races where there will be lots of waiting. Maybe you should leave him with Chris,” I thought to myself.
But, Augustin can be an angel with me and I love having him with me, and the sentimental thoughts begin to get to me – “this is your last child and he will be older before you know it,” and the wishful thinking dream life takes over, and the thoughts of a sweet 4-year-old brown eyed beautiful little perfect boy flood my mind and heart- he really has been perfect at events, so I brought Augustin along. . . .and you guessed, he had one of his impatient days, as any 4-year-old might. He was really good for the first part of the race, but I had told him that there was a play structure at the Park where the race was and soon that was all he could think of, and the sweet little guy got impatient and tired and wanted to go to the play structure, which I promised him we would do; then he got hungry so I promised to feed him lunch after staying for the second race, to see his brother run, but he did not want to.
Our older son, Ryan, now 16, was the exact same way at age 4, and back then I had to face reality – Ryan did not like to go shopping or having to wait anywhere (neither does Augustin) but in contrast, I could take Rachel, now 17, anytime, anywhere. I used to host a banquet at the Rhinelander Restaurant in Portland at the end of the term teaching a Germany class through Clackamas Community College and I only took Rachel with me, leaving Ryan behind. I could not chance in a professional situation taking Ryan, because, bless him, he just might act up. I love all my kids but realize that, yes, indeed, they are different. With different temperaments. And that temperament will take them far later in life.
` For now though, it might mean, not with me in certain circumstances.

Be well and keep in touch –

Cornelia Becker Seigneur

http://www.writermom.net/

www.myspace.com/corneliaseigneur
http://www.writermom5kids.blogspot.com/